IMUS= I'M A MESS!!

Ooops, he did it again~The poor old goof, Don Imus,  is once again in the soup! He's doing a frantic song and dance in an effort to not step in his own doo-doo! Don, honey, it's called "shut the gaping hole in the front of your face!" But what a tough lesson that is to learn for some of us! I'm right in there, too...

I can't go completely off on him though because I can identify with his pain on some level. My mouth gets me in more trouble than anything else! I'm a verbal processor. Sometimes I analyze things best by talking them through. In the process of arriving at my final destination, I often say the most asinine things...but USUALLY it's at my own expense-looking dumb, looking foolish-instead of insulting someone else. Offending others happens, too, at times, and when it does, it's usually the byproduct of engaging the mouth ahead of the brain! Ya' just don't think!  But I can see how things like this happen. You get going on what you think is a funny line of banter, everything is going great, and then you go just a bit too far. You make that comment and it gets taken wrong. It gets blown up all out of proportion.It rubs people the wrong way. It flies all over them! This can happen to anyone. I'm sure it has even happened to you. I know I've done it...more than once...in a day! And sometimes I feel like no matter what I say after that it's just WRONG, WRONG, WRONG!! I wonder if ol' Don can relate to that?

 But is that what really happened? Did Don Imus really mean to express that he believes a lot of African Americans are racially profiled unfairly by law enforcement? Or was he trying to say that Blacks are the ones out there committing most of the crimes? He claims the former but is being accused of the later. Which is true? It's hard to discern just what anyone of us truly intends. Then again, according to Dr. Phil, the best predictor of future behavior is past behavior. Don Imus does have a bit of a pattern going, it seems...


This happens with bold people, people who speak out, people who are in the white-hot spotlight. They get penalized for being honest, expressing themselves, or just being themselves!  We create a niche for them. We provide the audience and the platform. We give them a venue. Then when they give us what we ask for, they are criticised for it. Just like Howard Stern and others who make their living speaking outrageously, we forget that this is what we've come to expect and they are just delivering the goods. Negativity, sadly to say, sells!

There's something to be said for freedom of speech. I'm all for it! But with that comes the likelihood that you're not gonna like everything that gets thrown into the arena.

 There's also something to be said for good taste.

Which is definitely missing at times...but, hey, you have to admit that sometimes distasteful stuff also has a humorous twinge. Admit it, you DO laugh at some of this stuff!Then you get all righteous and outraged. I know because I do that too. We all do. It all depends on your tolerance for such things and how seriously you take what people say and do. When we really look at the life-and-death seriousness of things IT DOES MATTER:

Not to downplay a person's responsibility to be accountable for their speaking. When you flub up, the best thing to do is own it and take complete and total responsibility for it-including the consequences. Easy to say. Harder to do. 
 
How do we sort this all out?
I can relate. I am a bold person. I speak out. I express myself. Sometimes I get caught in a crapstorm of my own making because of it! But that's part of what makes me, me. I wear my heart on my sleeve.  There are good things about it,too! There's a lot of honest communication in my life. There's sharing that goes on because I'm not afraid to be open or to ask others questions-I hope respectfully-so that there can be communication and relationship. The Bible talks a lot about controlling the tongue. We are wise to shut off the flow and consider our words with care. We are admonished to say only what is edifying for others to hear. That's a tall order! Not all of us are wired that way. Not 24/7 anyway. It's a learning curve. Some of it comes with age and maturity. I guessDon better bust a move on that one then! Some of it comes from the realization that people don't usually change a behavior or thought pattern because of what we say-we all arrive via our own process and path. You get it when you get it.That path can be full of potholes! Two steps forward, one step back sorta thing...

So, I have some compassion for Don Imus because I know I've been guilty of the same thing: Saying some thing I regret! Sometimes you just get sick all over. You wish like crazy that you could just take it back-reel it all back in. But once the bell has been rung it can't be unrung.
I remember seeing Don Imus in an interview during his apology phase after the Rutgers incident. He looked like a little whipped puppy! That was a broken man. He was sick inside himself. I really do believe he was sorry.


But then he did sorta stir the pot again when he sued for wrongful dismissal...
then was awarded a whole lotta coin...
stuff like that makes the waters muddy when it comes to reaching a total conclusion about the guy. I'll need to ponder this further. I'm not ready to lock him securely in a box just yet. Think I'll allow him some space to show up differently in the future-some people do get those AHA! moments and make corrections...let's be optimistic!

I guess what I want to say about Don Imus is that I realize he's no better or worse than the rest of us. I know that Don and his wife are very involved in many charity concerns. He does do some good stuff too and deserves to have the public be aware of that side as well. On occasion, Don Imus actually has some good points and some worthwhile things to say. We all have a pleasing side and a side that's not so pretty. We all have a little black spot somewhere deep in our heart-of-hearts. We're a contradictory mix. Lots of polarity in us. Not all good, not all bad. We ALL show our butts now and then. Words get away from us. They take on a life of their own-sometimes in a direction we could never have anticipated!When that happens to us, we want people to cut us a little slack, show a little compassion. But we are all responsible to some degree for how we occur in the world to others also-how we show up.  There's a balance there. Before we get too far out on the skinny limb, we'd all do well to consider it. That's the issue we all need to look at...including Don "I'm-a-mess" Imus!
Maybe we should all consider taking this advice more often: 

Whatcha think?