Raped AT The Pump!

My bank account, that is! I am bitter about having just spent nearly 40 bucks to fill the tank of my little pee-pot Hyundai Accent! This is having a huge impact on how i ro! In fact, I foresee an Agoraphobia epidemic emerging as the result of this crisis. People will not leave their homes for fear of rising gas prices. Rumor has it $4.00+ per gallon this weekend for the Memorial Day weekend and possibly as high as $5 during the summer vacation season. According to Chicken Noodle News (CNN) an anti-trust lawsuit is being leveled at OPEC unless they agree to increase production. Wonder what sort of global crapstorm that will cause? Meantime, wouldn't it be handy if we could come up with a green solution to all of this and create an alternative fuel from something that has limited uses, propagates exponentially, and has an extreme surplus...say zucchini...or maybe rabbits(just kidding-don't call PETA or send me hate mail)! Perhaps I will have to resort to riding my new bike to work every day. Aside from the fact that I probably still need training wheels, it doesn't help that there are no shoulders on our road, no sidewalks, no bike paths and 18-wheelers barrel through here like suicide bombers on a mission! I wonder if we're going to have to go back to locking gas caps(circa 1980's) and finding crowbar-proof gas door latches to prevent thieves with redneck credit cards (siphon hoses) from jacking the gas in our tanks while we're parked somewhere. Is this leading to more drive-offs at gas stations? Will crime rates increase as people resort to committing burglaries or robbing banks to support their driving habits? Instead of muggers saying, "Your money or your life", will it be "Empty your gas tank or I'll shoot"? Instead of giving candy or flowers for Valentines day or diamond rings for engagements will it be gas cards? Where will this all end? Any ideas?