My issue this week with balance was not being in it! The main problem seemed to be working too many hours-nearly an 80-hour work week between my two jobs-and becoming very sleep deprived. I found that being out of balance with work led to being out of balance with my sleep which led to being out of balance with my eating since I found myself eating more for energy and to stay awake(like the caffeine in chocolate Easter candy!). I also felt out of balance emotionally because I wasn't sleeping or eating right and hadn't factored in a high enough fun/work ratio. Not enough social interaction.Everyone knows I'm the Queen of Fun. So, not having enough of it put me out of sorts.I had planned to go see Jesus Christ Superstar for the past three months but when it came right down to getting tickets for either Saturday or Sunday, I found that I had overscheduled myself to the point where none of the performance times worked for me. Plus, let's just throw in the weather! Who was prepared for that much snow during Easter week? Certainly not I! That did not contribute favorably to a festive holiday mood.Especially since we had already tasted the beginnings of spring on the lakeshore and that's a hard thing to let go of once it gets here because it takes so long to make it through winter some years. I am sick and tired of shoveling Lake Michigan! Speaking of balance....holidays seem to be a naturally unbalanced time. So many expectations. There can be a lot of extra work involved if you are hosting a meal and/or events like Easter egg hunts for the kids. There's church. There's the family dynamic. My family lives about 3,000 miles away and at this point in life I actually look forward to the times I get to see them.That eliminates the stress of a lot of preparation and hoopla-but there are times I wish I had some hoopla to worry over.Thank goodness(inject sarcasm here) my kids are older and only want me to take them out to a nice restaurant and/or give them money instead of an Easter basket! I think the expanded holiday schedule will return once my kids are married and have children of their own. I have actually learned to enjoy and appreciate a quieter holiday-but I still think holidays have a lot of potential for unbalance.
Just exactly what are we talking about here when we say balance? I think of not going to extremes, regulating excesses, and maintaining equilibrium. In the past, I have had a lot more struggle with all these aspects of balance. I think one of the major factors in achieving balance just has to do with growing up and maturity.I have healthier boundaries with people because I have gotten a better sense of myself over the years. I am not so thrown by the behaviors of others. I can maintain my equilibrium in situations better now that I have a few years on me.Even in relationships where boundaries were a huge issue, I find that I can get along with people and be nice and be respectful and still not allow myself to be run over or treated like a doormat.I notice that education and experience can also help in the balance department. This has been especially true in the area of learning how to handle money and eating habits.Both of these areas have been troublesome in the past but I have spent some time reading and learning and then have put this knowledge into practice. God Bless people like Suze Orman who write books about finances that even people like me can understand! I recently received a nice tax refund. In times past, that would have gone into a trip or new clothes. This time around, I paid off my car and several other bills that needed to get cleaned up and then I bought myself one new thing I really wanted-a nice digital camera-so I can take pictures everywhere and perhaps even spice up my blog! I have been going to Weight Watchers and also reading Bob Greene's book Best Life Diet. I have lost about 20 pounds since the beginning of the year. The key to balance there seems to be in making gradual and sustainable habit changes in eating and exercise that slowly alter your body over time and become lifelong health habits. Way back in the day I used to go for the quick fix and now I'm finding that slow and steady wins every time. I remind myself that Rome wasn't carved in a day. Good things often take a period of time, some patience and definitely perseverance.
Here's my week in review:
Sunday, April 1, 2007: Tyler and I were looking forward to having Jayden and going to Frederick Meijer Gardens to show him the butterfly exhibit.Tyler and Linda got into one of their famous brouhaha's and that ended that.It had started to rain and it was dark and dreary.Seeing as we were already depressed, we decided to take our depression to the next level and watch the Al Gore movie, An Inconvenient Truth. For those of you who may not be familiar with this movie, the theme of it is global warming and how the earth is going to hell in a hand basket because we are not being accountable in our use of natural resources. There was a lot of thought-provoking information in this movie. The thing I enjoyed most was experiencing how dedicated Al Gore has been in his pursuit to call attention to this problem. It is inspiring to see that one person who is really passionate and focused about something can make such a huge impact. I felt a lot more enlightened on the subject afterwards and I have to admit to paying more attention to information about global warming when it comes up. On the down side, the problem of global pollution in general is very overwhelming. I feel compelled to see what I can do individually and to influence others in my sphere to be conservationists. We all need to do our part. After all, where else can we live? I had to go to shelter at 8:45pm and work until 8:45am when I went to work@Body.
Monday, April 2, 2007: Worked at Body Perfections from 9-4:30. Then I quick changed clothes and met my friend Sandy in Grand Rapids for dinner. She lives in Holt so GR is about half way for both of us. We try to do this about once a month but circumstances on both ends have gotten in our way lately so it's been several months since we've seen each other. I was so glad to have a fun little break. We behaved ourselves especially well by sharing an appetizer and an entree and skipping desert. We did have a couple margaritas for medicinal purposes only, of course.It is our custom to go across the street to Centerpointe Mall and first, bum ourselves out by going through Klingman's (high dollar furniture store) and then we cheer ourselves back up by going to TJ Max! I had bought dinner so Sandy was going to get us desert and coffee but we opted for something healthier. She bought us each a box of Mentos and took the rest of the money she was going to spend on desert and we both sat down in those massage chairs in the mall and had about 20 minute massages instead of desert, all the while doing our usual people-watching and laughing about absolutely nothing and everything! We walk the mall a couple times to feel better about our calorie consumption. Talking a mile a minute as usual.Friends are such gifts! We left feeling very empowered by our self-control over the desert thing and vowed to get together again much sooner-no matter what.
Tuesday, April 3, 2007: Worked from 9am-3pm. Had to go to the library for some research. Made note to self: do not go into field of research as a job! Do not pursue grant writing! Not your bag,Lana! The library people were very helpful and seemed to enjoy their work but the whole experience made me nervous.Meanwhile, flashback to my work day, I had one client put me onto a website for aspiring writers, musicians and artists. Come to find out, she is herself a published writer and just finished a ghostwriting job for another person. She is a very generous soul and offered to participate with me in my writing endeavors, namely feedback and coaching.The website she referred me to was: www.shoutlife.com. I found out that another one of my clients is a life coach( I didn't think there were any around here!) and is working in the areas of organization for spaces like home and office and the management of time. She will be giving some mini-seminars in the area and I am going to go to those.When I get her website I will post it for you.Then, same day, I hear from my ex, Lew, who knows I have been looking into coaching education programs. He puts me onto a coaching academy that has an office in Chicago. That site is : www.ipeccoaching.com. The program appears to be exactly what I'm looking for.I am going to attend one of their informational sessions in the near future.Lewis also offered to mentor me this fall by allowing me to co-coach some experiential learning seminars he has developed for his company in California.They are very much like the seminars we attended when Tyler was in "the program" and are very much like the sort of trainings I would like to offer some day in my own business, Baker Life Services, which hasn't been born yet but is in the gestational phases as we speak.I am happy that even though the marriage was a train wreck, Lewis still respects me and believes in my abilities professionally and is willing to continue our relationship in a different venue.That is balance in action! How many ex-spouses can actually work together?! He also confided that even though he is a corporate coach, he still considers me to be his coach.Go figure! This day had the feel to it that everyone, everywhere was coming out to the woodwork to give me the information and support I need to go on to the next level. Ever since my coaching call with Keith Ferrazzi I have been feeling very energized about pushing ahead.It's that law of attraction thing. When you are vibrating at a higher frequency you pull in people and information that is just what you needed.I have decided to become involved once again with Landmark Education, get going on these writing sites and my new hobby-blogging, and get involved with the lifecoach I know and the other organizations in town that are doing the kind of work I aspire to. I just became aware of a ministry in this area called City on a Hill. I am going to find out all I can about what is going on there...I feel a blog coming on about that! Things are beginning to move and I am excited about the possibilities that the future holds.
Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday April 4,5, 6, and 7: Here's where it got all out of control! On Wednesday I worked until 4:30, then went to my Weight Watchers meeting and got home about 6:30. I did dinner, cleaned up the house a little, and packed for the shelter. I had shelter duty from 9:45 pm until 9am on Thursday. I worked at Body from 9am on Thursday until 9pm. Went home. Crashed . Got up and went to work 9am-7pm at Body. Then had shelter again overnight from 10:45pm until I went to work at Body at 9am. I worked at Body until 3pm. Went home and ate. Laid down for a quick nap. So exhausted I missed church! I was really out of balance then!!! I wait all year for Easter service and then get myself so twitterpated about working that I miss the whole point.As Dr. Phil would say, " How's that workin' for ya'?" Yeah. I was so wrapped around the axle this week that I forgot completely about Lent being over and STILL haven't gone to Starbucks for a latte!
That about does it for my week in review. This next week has already been more balanced.I got some sleep.I have decided to make a more conscious effort to balance work and play and solitude and socializing and money and eating and boundaries and relationships.
Thanks for all the emails! I have the best friends and family anyone could ever want.I know that for many of you this is your first exposure to a blog.I'm not much further ahead but let me just encourage you to not be so shy. It's ok if you post your comments to the blog.Really.Better yet, why not start your own? Go ahead... be brave...get out there! I love you all. God Bless.
Peace out, Lana!
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2 comments:
You put me to shame, Lana. I have a blog at LiveJournal.com but rarely write anything because I think my life is too boring most days, and then the things I want to write about are too personal to put in this medium. I am conflicted. I like your style. I like your ability to concisely put your thoughts down in your blog. I need to practice doing that. You have inspired me to try harder. I will write something today!
Thanks for the encouragement! I think everyone should blog-it's very therapeutic and brings a lot of clarity. We learn a lot from one another when we share. I will look forward to visiting your blog.
Hugs!
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